Voices of the True Woman Movement: A Call to the Counter Revolution

I have been blessed to receive a free copy of Voices of the True Woman Movement by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. When I put my name down to receive a copy to review, I didn't know if they would be willing to send it to Tasmania, Australia! So I received a pleasant surprise when it arrived in the mail. I look forward to reviewing each chapter of this book over the next few months.

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Biblical Womanhood guest post

You may be interested in a guest post I did for Biblical Womanhood last week, titled Don't Repeat My Mistakes!", in which I encourage teens to learn household skills.

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My first polls!

Thank you to those who voted in the polls that recently finished, especially to my husband who was the only man to vote! It was fun to find out how he had grown in the last year. I was encouraged that so many of my blog readers feel they have grown in loving their husbands, learning from older women, teaching younger women, discretion, and homemaking. Praise God for what he is doing in your lives! It is great that there ended up being at least one person who chose each of the important areas God calls us to grow in as women, including loving children, avoiding slander, reverent behaviour, and purity. May God continue to bless you all!

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Learning from older women

You have already met my Mum through her post The wisdom only God can give. Here she is teaching me to clean my windows. In the book Family Practice Elizabeth Elliot suggests that the command for older women to teach the younger women is primarily a practical one. Older women can help the younger women through practically showing them how to care for their homes and families. This is the way Mum helped me this week, when she came over to show me how to clean windows. I encourage you to seek out an older woman to teach you a practical task you have not yet mastered - perhaps dusting, or cleaning the shower, or baking bread. Most women would be only too happy to share their skills and experiences with someone who cared to know.

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The example of Elizabeth Prentiss

Felicity Manning is a young woman at my church. I have had the pleasure of seeing Felicity grow in godliness over the past few years. She shares some encouraging words about seeking out the wisdom of those who have gone before us.

When Sherrin asked me to write a guest post about wise women I was honoured but unsure who and what to write about. However, as I thought about all the Godly wise women who had crossed my paths I was drawn to one women who I have never met. At the beginning of last year, the girls over at Girltalk started reading , Elizabeth Prentiss: 'More Love to Thee' in their bookclub. I purchased this book and started reading this biography of Elizabeth Prentiss. It is a fantastic book that I would recommend to any women to read.

Through reading the about Elizabeth Prentiss' life I was able to see a Christian women who although lived in a different century and country to me, was an example of trusting God through all lives circumstances. The back cover of the book describes it best.

“Do you sometimes feel that you would be able to grow in love for God and others—if only your circumstances were different? Maybe you find that the sheer demands of everyday life squeeze out time for God? Perhaps a terrible tragedy has made you doubt the goodness of God?”
“Read this true story to find out how one woman discovered that:

-The most difficult circumstances are ‘God’s school’ to teach us more about his grace.
-The very busy times are precisely those times when we need—and can find—God’s strength.
-The worst of tragedies can draw us closer to God.”

Through reading this biography I was able to see the whole life of a Christian woman, a woman who experienced sorrow, suffering, joy and victories, and yet what marked her most was her deep dependence and faith in God. She was an example to me that God is greater than our circumstances and that it is when we don't feel strong enough he gives us the strength to continue and draws us closer to him.

"As Cotton Mather, the well-known American Puritan once wrote: “examples do strangely charm us into imitation.” That’s why we tend to talk, dress, and behave a lot like the people we live and mingle with—even after only two weeks. Or, as Proverbs 13:20 observes: “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” By reading biographies, we can “walk” with wise men and women from history and become wise ourselves through their trials, obstacles, doubts, victories, and strengths. And because they have already finished their journey, we can discover what it means to live and end well." ~ Girltalk blog

I pray we can look for and follow the examples of the wise women around us.

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God who alone is wise

Karen sent me this Scripture which is applicable to our topic for this week . . .

"Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, to God who alone is wise, be honor and glory forever and ever. Amen." 1 Timothy 1:17

Wise women (and men!) gain their wisdom from the "God who alone is wise".

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Marriage to a sinner

When I was preparing to be married, I asked a few women for advice. One of them was Karen from the Sower's Corner. Karen kindly sacrificed her time to share her thoughts extensively. She included some great thoughts about marriage to a sinner, which I've copied here. I still haven't read "When Sinners Say "I Do"", but it is on my list of goals for this year!

First, and I think the most important, is knowing that you are both sinners. This dashes unrealistic expectations that we have for one another. It also brings us closer together, realizing that it is all by grace. God's grace is the glue, used by His Holy Spirit Who is developing our character. Conforming us into Christ's image.

With all of that said, there is an excellent book that just came out called "When Sinners Say "I Do" Discovering the power of the Gospel for Marriage by Dave Harvey. I just bought this book and I'm reading through it.

In the beginning of your relationship you tend to read a lot of books on marriage and relationships and then that falls aside...my advice is to invest in your relationship by reading and buying good books on marriage. In every marriage, there are times where because of life's demands you become "dull". You sharpen and stir up your feelings and love by periodically (maybe once a year or every six months) reading or re-reading a good marriage book. I would start with When Sinners Say "I Do".

As you are reading books on your role as a wife, remember that you are a complement to your husband. So all of your strengths are there to complement his weaknesses and vice versa . . .

Another area about roles that I had struggled with and now understand better is when it is appropriate to speak to my husband about something that needs correcting with him. For a long time, I thought that I shouldn't correct him, I should only pray for him and let the Lord do the correcting. This was not a loving thing for my husband. Remember we are both sinners and we both have blind areas. Sometimes these blind areas keep us from really walking in the Lord the way we desire. The Lord often times will show us what is needed and we must gracefully bring correction.

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The wisdom only God can give

This guest post is from my Mum, Lorraine Ward. Mum is a wonderful example of wise womanhood. I have watched her walk out the truths she describes here. I hope and pray that I will become more like my Mum.

I have been a Christian for 38 years, but it was many years before I realized that I had no wisdom of my own and that there is no such thing as human wisdom. As a young believer I thought I had answers to a lot of life issues but now I know with certainty that true wisdom is all God’s and that I only receive His wisdom when He reveals Himself to me and when I rest totally in His grace, coming under His Lordship in all things. Then I begin to see His wisdom at work in my life.

Many times I have had to repent of walking in my own thinking, while saying I was following Him. Many times I have opened my mouth to speak foolish words which I thought were wise. Only through the bad consequences did I learn that wisdom comes through the death of self and trusting in His Way in relationships and plans.

Many times my flesh cries out to gossip or speak unkind words, but as I cry out to the Lord He whispers gently to me, “Be still and know that I am God.”….”A gentle answer turns away wrath.” “Wisdom is better than weapons of war.” Many times I have wanted to rush forward without waiting on the Lord , but with my sin confessed, I have turned to Him and asked for wisdom and He has given it to me in the most surprising and unexpected ways. I just know that it had to be God who gave me that wisdom. My sinful heart would never have thought of it!

I once battled with bad feelings toward someone and wrestled with a crisis relationship for a time. I cried out to the Lord and repented of my independent spirit and I woke one morning to the wisdom of God when the words came clearly to my mind, “Whoever slaps you on the right cheek turn the other to him also.” Yes, Lord, only You could have such wisdom. This really changed my relationship to that person and it is bearing His good fruit.

With His wisdom comes a quiet comforting peace that God is reigning and that in my day to day struggles He has the victory over evil as I choose to let His wisdom work in my life.

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Words of wisdom and kindness

As the first post for our week of wise womanhood, I am very blessed to be able to share with you this wonderful guest post from Deb of Mountain Musings. Deb shares about the someone who has blessed her through wise and kind words. I have benefitted from Deb's words of wisdom and kindness as well, through her blog and through the advice she gave me (upon request) as I began married life.

She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness. ~ Proverbs 31:26

I feel very honored that Sherrin asked me to consider writing a guest post for this week's focus on "Becoming a Woman of Wisdom." After praying about what to write, the Lord laid the above verse on my heart and brought to mind someone who exhibits this verse in her life. The friend I'm thinking of is very gifted in speaking words of encouragement and kindness and is a true example of the woman the Lord teaches us to be like in Proverbs 31.

I first met Sherri via her daughter's blog a couple of years ago. Even though I didn't know her very well at the time, she blessed me through her comments and emails. This past summer our families were allowed to meet in person when they traveled through our state. I was drawn to Sherri's peaceful manner and by the light of the Lord on her face as we conversed.

After being a recipient of her weekly emails of scriptural encouragement she writes and sends to her family and friends, I can tell she is a woman of great faith and wisdom. I've gained insight from her writings on Wisdom for Decision Making, Wisdom from Ecclesiastes, Virtue From Christ, and A More Excellent Way--Charity. Serving the Lord and relying on His wisdom are emphasized, and I look forward each week to what the Lord has laid on her heart.

Sherri's life is surely a sweet savor of Christ, and I am inspired to be more a student of the Word from her example.

For the Lord giveth wisdom: out of His mouth cometh knowledge and understanding. ~ Proverbs 2:6

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Becoming a Woman of Wisdom - a week of celebration!

Next week I am planning a week of celebration of God's wisdom for being a woman. Wise womanhood is already a major theme of my blog, but next week there will be a special focus upon the topic. I am passionate about biblical womanhood, and I hope that you are too! I even saved a blog address on the topic - www.wisewomanhood.blogspot.com, but have decided to stick with this address and overall theme. My friend Margaret Sonnemann created this lovely banner for me, but so far I haven't been able to work out how to get it into the header of wisewomanhood.blogspot.com. Perhaps my study of HTML and CSS will help.

Now, about next week!

I have asked several ladies if they will write guest posts for me. Two have said a definite "yes", and one of them is my mother. She is one of the wisest women I know, and I'm sure you'll be blessed by whatever she has to share.

Other readers, whom I haven't asked in person, are more than welcome to write a guest post as well. Just email me your submission. I'd particularly like to hear from men, as I'm sure they also have insights into biblical womanhood. Here are some ideas . . .

* A woman who has blessed your life. This person doesn't have to be a Christian, but must display some characteristics of godly wisdom (for example, faithfulness to her husband) which are worthy of commendation.

* A blog or book that has helped you to grow in godly wisdom.

* A wise woman in the Bible whose example has helped you.

* Characteristics of biblical wisdom.

* An incident in your life which helped you to become a wiser person.

Please join with me in this week of celebration! I can hardly wait!

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Perseverant love

Carolyn's blog Radical Womanhood, formerly Solo Femininity, is worth visiting. Carolyn expreses a lot of wisdom through her study of God's word and her commitment to Him. Radical Womanhood recently featured a post about perseverant love, titled the pink bear parable. Carolyn says . . .

I want to love and be loved until all that remains is a tattered remnant. Then may the Lord gently lay me to rest, closing my mortal eyes until the day I exchange an imperishable body for the one that wore out.

This weekend I've struggled with perseverant love. It is easy to grow tired of giving, isn't it? Yet God calls us to keep on, and keep on, and keep on giving. To give until it hurts, then give some more. Our aim should not be to preserve our own lives, but to wear them out for the sake of others.

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"The Excellent Wife" is a wonderful source of advice

In light of my post about giving and receiving advice I’d like to once again recommend Martha Peace’s The Excellent Wife as a wonderful resource which is packed full of biblical advice. I would happily recommend this book to any woman preparing for marriage. Martha continually draws her readers to the word of God. Reading The Excellent Wife is one way to become equipped to pass on truly wise advice, when asked. It covers everything from homemaking to submission, speech to bitterness – all with a thorough biblical basis. It is easy to compare Martha’s advice to God’s advice, because she continually refers to the Bible. This means that readers can assess the basis for her comments. I am still working through the study guide, and I find it a great way to learn to love my husband better. Applying the word of God with the help of the Holy Spirit is the only way to effectively address the sins and problems I sometimes encounter as a new wife.

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Foolish speaking harms us

Whoever guards his mouth and tongue
Keeps his soul from troubles.
Proverbs 21:23

I came across this Proverb today and it seemed very relevant to my previous post! As with many other sins, foolish speaking harms the one who does it as much as those who hear it and those who are the victims of it.

I'd like to draw your attention to a great resource on the topic of speech. Scott Brown's CD Gossip: The Plague of the Church is a very thought provoking and challenging message. I recently lent it to a friend, but after it is returned I am happy to lend it to anyone else I'm in physical contact with. As sisters (and brothers) in Christ, we need to hold one another accountable. I want my sisters in Christ to do this for me. It is very hard to be rebuked, but it is much less harmful than continuing in this sin. Wise women don't gossip, and we need to remind each other of that.

In Proverbs 21 there are also scriptures which are directly relevant to women's tongues . . .

Better to dwell in a corner of a housetop,
Than in a house shared with a contentious woman.
Proverbs 21: 9

The same chapter also says that it is better to dwell in the wilderness than with such a woman. As wives (or daughters or sisters), we need to remember the misery we can cause with our tongues. If we push our husbands away, we too will suffer as a result.

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Please, speak loving words.

As God's people, we are called to speak words that reflect Christ's love. There are many instructions about the tongue in the Old and New Testaments. One that I remember from Proverbs is: "a wholesome tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit".

Stacy McDonald has recently been attacked on the Internet. She writes:

Along with the growth of the Internet, the potential for sin has grown. Rather than gossiping with just one neighbor at a time, now the blogging housewife can count the hits on her site meter as she multiplies her possibilities.

Once, God commanded young widows "to marry, to have children, to manage their homes" because they had been "gossips and busybodies, saying things they ought not to" and "going about from house to house" (1 Timothy 5:13 - 14). Now, married women with children have access to all kinds of technology that allows them to go from house to house while they sit in the comfort of their own living rooms. The principal of this passage still applies, however. Women need to concentrate their attentions upon loving their husbands, loving their children, and being competent keepers at home (Titus 2) rather than "sharing" with other women. There are, of course, times to share and discuss. As Stacy says:

Let me be clear, I don't believe that an honest critique, or a godly debate or discussion, is an act of slander, libel, or gossip. Book reviews (that actually review a book—not the personal “impressions” the reviewer has about the author), discussions on email lists and blogs regarding a specific teaching or biblical truth, and even respectful debates can be fruitful. Iron sharpens iron and we can all learn a lot in these settings.

Obviously, Stacy has a blog and so she is not saying that women should not share insights or encouragement. However, I do wonder how any woman who is doing her utmost to care for her home and family has time to gossip and slander on the Internet. Personally, I find it hard enough to blog about all the positive, Bible based things that I dream of sharing. I also have little time for reading blogs, and gravitate toward those that affirm what God has designed rather than tear others down.

Please read Stacy's whole article We're Not Gossiping. We're Networking. This is an area of sin that many, many women, myself included, struggle with. While I don't tend toward it on the Internet, it is easy in everyday conversation to choose to share others' sins when it really isn't necessary. Lets purpose to resist the temptation. Lets speak loving words about God's people, even when we disagree with them. Tearing Christians down with our tongues is no way to treat those who will share heaven with us.

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Why throw out the birth control? Why love disabled disabled babies?

Over the years I've read Barbara Curtis' blog on and off . . . and been especially blessed by her perspective on down syndrome and loving children who are disabled. You can read one of her posts on this here and gain a new perspective on what down syndrome kids "look like".

She writes . . .

The fear is irrational but real. When women have never known a person with Down syndrome and have absorbed the implicit message of all the prenatal testing - that you don't have to have a baby who isn't "perfect" - then they panic when the diagnosis comes back positive. They're not thinking clearly, they're pressured to make a quick decision, and often they're advised by professionals to "terminate" and give it another chance.

When I talk to high school classes about this, I explain that this is the kind of decision you want to make in advance - even before you get married. And it's the kind of thing you want to talk about with a future spouse. Life comes at you fast - it's really wise to know where you stand on important issues like this before you begin to even think about marriage. Because this is the kind of issue which can tear a marriage apart.

Barbara opposes this culture of death with her pen and with her life . . . she has given birth to one child with down syndrome and adopted three more.

I was also interested to read Barbara's article on Christianity Today about Why some evangelicals are throwing out their birth control. This part particularly struck me, because it expresses my thoughts and my story so well.

Among younger Christian moms, many report going on The Pill before their wedding day as a matter of course – expected by their parents, their in-laws, and everyone else. Some report paradigm shifts set off by side effects: depression, weight gain, lack of sex drive.

Others discovered to their horror – since they considered themselves pro-life – that the pill can act as an abortifacient. They gave it up immediately.

While some went on to barrier methods, for others the shakeup of their preconceived ideas led them to rethink and scrap birth control altogether.

Many who structured their marriages to come off The Pill when they felt ready have been disappointed to find that fertility isn’t something we can turn off and on like a light switch. They struggle with infertility and miscarriages – adding up to much more time than they bargained for waiting for a baby.

I have never used hormonal bith control, but finding out about the effects of the Pill (thanks to Randy Alcorn and Eternal Perspective Ministries) did change my whole view of birth control in general . . . so much so that marrying someone who agreed was a priority. I don't feel at all "superior" to others who make different choices. I am just immensely grateful to God that he showed me parts of his truth in this area, so that I could avoid the heartbreak of making choices I could have regretted for the rest of my life.

Barbara is a wise woman. I am grateful to her, to other writers on the Internet, and especially to Eternal Perspective Ministries for changing my perspective on God's plan for family life.

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Children memorising the Bible

It was a great encouragementy to read Crystals thoughts on memorising the Bible with children. What a wonderful legacy she will leave to her daughters! There is no greater gift than the word of God himself.

One of my goals with this blog is simply to point any readers I have to women wiser than myself. Women who have persevered through different trials and experiences, and who have godly wisdom to share as a result. They have learnt more fully how to love God and others.

Titus 2 tells young women to love their children - and Crystal is one example of someone who is doing just that!

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Passionate Housewives Desperate for God

I am very excited about a new book coming out soon, Passionate Housewives Desperate for God. This book is by Jennie Chancey and Stacy McDonald. I have read much of Jennie's writing, and have corresponded with her personally, and I have the greatest respect for her. I have also been reading Stacy's blog recently and I have been impressed with her graciousness toward those who disagree.

I agree with Dave that the title is "odd", but I also understand why they chose it. Do you normally associate the word "Passionate" with the word "Housewife"? If you are anything like me, you are more likely to have been taught to associate the word housewife with bored, possibly in need of medication for depression, lazy, or harried. Likewise with the word "Desperate". In our culture, we are conditioned to think that if a housewife is desperate for anything it is to escape the boredom of her life at home. It is great that Stacy and Jennie are working to create new ideas about who a housewife is!

You can visit the book's site here.

I also recommend reading a recent post that quotes from Courtney Tarter's thoughts on Why Feminism Hurts Women. Feminism has impacted upon all women who are born in the midst of it. Even though I intellectually reject it, I still find myself feeling inadequate at times because I don't have a great career and I don't earn much money.

Those of us who reject feminism recognise that It's not about choice. Those of us who make choices that are in opposition to feminism still find ourselves greatly impacted by its effects on society.

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Choosing life

Yesterday I read an incredible blog post, In Memory of a Woman Who Chose Life. This moving post is the story of one woman who chose life. Doug Phillips writes:

I can only imagine the pressure she felt to try to erase the embarrassment, to end the physical discomfort, and to avert the potential shame and rejection she would experience as she faced her own legitimate children and extended family with the news that their mother had conceived a child with a married man.

Her choice not to abort caused thousands to be blessed. Please read this post and be inspired to choose life in every way you can. I rate this as the best, most inspirational blog post I have read this year.

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Crystal's new initative for passionate home economists

Crystal Paine of Biblical Womanhood has a new blog devoted to frugality. You can read about it in the Money Saving Mom welcome message. You don't have to be a Mum to appreciate what Crystal has to say there! Since I have become a wife, I've become more interested in frugality than I was as a single at home. Now I am responsible for shopping! On one hand we don't want to be obsessed or worried about finances. We want to enjoy what God has given. On the other hand, we want to save money if that can be done without greatly diminishing life's enjoyment! We also want to ensure that we continue to prioritise hospitality, which inevitably increases our grocery budget. When you are feeding 2 - 10 extra people for one or two meals a week, it is bound to cost something. I am excited that Crystal is so committed to helping women to be frugal. Much of her blog focuses upon couponing, which is not a big thing here in Australia, but I am sure the blog will still offer many tips for those who live here. Crystal is wisely passionate about helping other women to love home and family, and her new blog is one way that she exhibits this passion.

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