Hobart Above Rubies Camp 2010

Above Rubies is a ministry devoted to encouraging wives and mothers, with a free magazine that is always exciting to receive! I was happy to be able to go to the camp here in Hobart last weekend. I met lots of interesting and encouraging people, including the ladies pictured above. There was great diversity amongst both organisers and attenders, they certainly didn't fit any stereotypes that people may have of the magazine! This is testament to the fact that women from many walks of life want and need encouragement in their roles of wives and mothers. We may not all agree on education, day care, birth control, the gifts of the Spirit, or countless other issues, but we all want to grow as women of God. I felt that there was a spirit of freedom and love at the camp, and we were all encouraged to take away one thing we could put into action.

Nancy Campbell (pictured left) is the founder of Above Rubies. Originally from New Zealand, Nancy now lives in the USA. She had not visited Tasmania for 20 years prior to this camp. Nancy is pictured with Val Stares (Australian director) and Heather (NZ director). Nancy spoke about our vital building project - building our families. She explained many of the things that Satan can use to hinder us, including discouragement, "help" that undermines the family, self pity, fear, accusations, doubts, and false counsel. I am vulnerable in each of these areas and found the reminders helpful.

When I was seven months pregnant with Elnathan in March last year I was a bridesmaid and wore this dress. The dinner was a fun opportunity to wear it again . . . 7 months pregnant again! We were asked to come dressed to represent one of the seasons. I sat at the Spring table. There were tables for the other seasons as well, and they were all stunning. I was impressed with the work that had been put into the night. It was a treat to go away and be served! We also all received numerous gifts over the weekend, which were donated.

One of my favourite aspects of the camp was talking with other ladies and hearing/seeing what God was doing in their lives. I was affirmed in many of our convictions, and have a renewed sense of the importance of bearing and raising children. I am so grateful for my wonderful husband who cares about building the church, Christian education, welcoming children, having family devotions, etc. God is good! I came away desiring to grow in building our marriage, to look to God's word as our light, and to love being a mother.

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Bay Christian Church sermons

I've been wanting to share our church's sermon archive with you for a while. We attend Bay Christian Church which is just 5 minutes drive from our home. We have particularly benefited from two recent talks, "A prayer for experience" and "Kingdom prayer". These are both available on the Bible talks page. The sermon "A prayer for experience" focuses on the need to experience God's love. Last week we found the sermon "Whose Kingdom - Mine or Yours" thought provoking, and we discussed the need to stand guard against all kinds of greed. Dave will be preaching on the parable of the good Samaritan tomorrow, and we've been working hard to prepare!

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The reversal of hope

Today I came across another prayer that reminds us of why God sometimes does not answer our prayers in the way we hope. Read Most Richly Blessed and be reminded of God's priorities for our lives and our hopes. 

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Single minded desire for God's glory

This prayer from Blaise Pascal is an encouragement to desire God's glory above our own comfort.

Take from me, Lord, that self-pity which love of myself so readily produces, and fromt he frustration of not succeeding in the world as I would naturally desire, for these have no regard for your glory. Rather, create in me a sorrow that is conformable to your own . . . Let me no longer wish for health or life, but to spend it and end it for you, with you, and in you. I pray neither for health or sickness, life nor death. Rather I pray that you will dispose of my health, my sickness, my life, and my death, as for your glory, for my salvation, for the usefulness to your church and your saints, among whom I hope to be numbered. You alone know what is expedient for me . . . Conform my will to yours . . . May I equally adore whatever proceeds from you.

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The Valley of Vision: A Collection of Puritan Prayers & Devotions

I love this book. It prompts me to pray in ways that I otherwise would not know how to pray. It helps me to think of God as I ought, reminding me of truths about who he is. It challenges me in regard to my sin, and leads me to call upon God for greater faith and obedience. I not only enjoy reading the prayers aloud and making them my own, but also using them as starting points for my own prayers. On many occasions parts of the prayers have come to mind as I lay in bed or went about my work. I  have worked on committing some to memory. Today parts of the prayer "Openness" (those sections in bold) have reminded me to pray for a life that is focused on things that will matter eternally:

Lord of immortality

Before whom angels and archangels veil their faces,

enable me to serve thee with reverence and godly fear.

Thou who art Spirit and requirest truth in the inward parts,

help me to worship thee in spirit and in truth.

Thou who art righteous,

let me not harbour sin in my heart,

or indulge a worldly temper

or seek satisfaction in things that perish.

I hasten towards an hour

when all earthly pursuits and possessions will appear vain,

when it will be indifferent whether I have been rich or poor,

successful or disappointed,

admired or despised.

But it will be of eternal moment that I have mourned for sin,

hungered and thirsted after righteousness,

loved the Lord Jesus in sincerity,

gloried in his cross.

May these objects engross my chief solicitude!

Produce in me those principles and dispositions

that make thy service perfect freedom.

Expel from my mind all sinful fear and shame,

so that with firmness and courage I may

confess the redeemer before men,

go forth with him bearing his reproach,

be zealous with his knowledge,

be filled with his wisdom,

walk with his circumspection,

ask counsel of him in all things,

repair to the Scriptures for his orders,

stay my mind on his peace,

knowing that nothing can befall me

without his permission, appointment and administration.

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A Mom Just Like You

I have been receiving inspiration from Vickie and Jayme Farris's book "A Mom Just Like You". Vickie is a homeschool Mother of 10 children, and she writes frankly about her struggles and the reasons why she keeps on going. I have enjoyed the way the book is frank about the weaknesses and struggles we may face, but also provides many reasons to persevere. Vickie does not encourage readers to just embrace her conclusions, rather she urges them to search the scriptures and come to convictions for themselves about what they should do with their lives. Trust in God and relationship with Him is emphasized throughout. The book covers many topics, including prioritising your marriage and teaching a large family. I recommend this book for other mothers who hope to homeschool.

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The God who delights to humble us

Suppose you eliminated suffering, what a dreadful place the world would be! because everything that corrects the tendency of man to feel over-important and over-pleased with himself would disappear. He's bad enough now, but he would be absolutely intolerable if he never suffered."

Malcolm Muggeridge, as quoted in Elizabeth Elliot's A Path Through Suffering: Discovering the Relationship Between God's Mercy and Our Pain

My labour experience with Elnathan was a wonderful example of God's providence and answered prayer, which I hope we will always look back upon with gratitude. It was also one of the most painful and difficult experiences of my life, which I came out of thinking "Wow, I've been through that and I'm still here!". Our early weeks with Elnathan have likewise been full of examples of God's goodness, and full of physical pain as I've had problems with breastfeeding.

At times I've wondered what on earth God was doing - the pain of birth seemed enough, without the added feeding problems. My answer is that God has humbled us through this pain. We often prayed for humility, and God has answered through suffering. There is nothing like suffering to put us in our place. Pain reminds us that we are not in control. We have to surrender to God's will, not our own. 

Suffering also reminds us not to judge ourselves to be better than others. Would we do better if we were in their place, with their suffering? My relatively small sufferings have given me a greater appreciation for the reasons why people might be afraid of birth, or might give up breastfeeding in favour of the bottle. I don't believe I was ever harshly judgmental of those who opt for elective cesareans or bottle feed from the start. Now though, I realise that I could easily be one of them if I did not have so much wonderful support. 

Pain has humbled me again. May God be glorified.

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45 days immersed in God's word

Today I reached the milestone of completing half of the "read the Bible in 90 days" plan. It is an answer to prayer that I've been able to keep up with it (sometimes, like today, through completing two days in one). It is not easy to read 10 - 20 + chapters of the Bible each day, and requires me to prioritise Bible reading over lots of other activities or reading that it would be nice to complete. That is exactly why I chose to attempt this plan. I wanted to purposefully devote my late pregnancy to learning about God. A challenge like this seemed like a great way to do so!

At times I have wondered if there were really benefits to soaking myself in Scripture at such a rapid rate. I think it was somewhere between 1 Samuel and 1 Chronicles that I began to wonder if being soaked in ugly stories about Israel's history was at all edifying! I remembered though, that Israel really lived through this. God really bore with his people through this. Couldn't I stick with it a few days? Before I knew it I was paging through the more familiar pages of Job and the Psalms. The more I've read, the more convinced I am that reading through the Bible quickly does have benefits. I've gained a stronger perspective on God's work through in and through his people - the "big picture" of who God is and what he cares about.

I believe that God blesses our efforts to seek Him, even if the results are not immediately evident. Here are a few of the aspects of Scripture that I've felt the Holy Spirit has particularly applied to my heart as I've commited to reading God's word. . .

* We had a terrible wind storm in January. I was home alone and a little afraid of the wind. It was hard to stand against it as I tried to stake the tomatoes, rescue the roses, and tie back the sunflowers. As I looked at the wind God reminded me of how much more terrifying his wrath is. I had a good picture of this through the Bible history I'd been reading!

* I've coloured in many themes during my reading time. One of these is the fatherless and widows. I'd never noticed before the way that Job's defence of his righteousness hinges upon the way he treated the poor. Job says that if he had mistreated the poor and fatherless he would deserve his suffering. However, instead he had been as a father to the fatherless (Job 31:18) and shared his food with the widow (Job 31:17).

* Fear is another theme I've explored. The fear of God has become clearer to me, as have our other fears. God is a Father who speaks to the realities of human emotions and reactions. He does us the great kindness of not leaving us to our own devices. Instead, he reaches down to teach us how to love and fear Him in the midst of it all!

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Year's End

"Year's End", a prayer from The Valley of Vision, is ideal to meditate on at the start of 2009.

O love beyond compare,
Thou art good when thou givest,
when thou takest away,
when the sun shines upon me,
when night gathers over me.
Thou has loved me before the foundation of the world,
and in love didst redeem my soul;
Thou dost love me still,
in spite of my hard heart, ingratitude, distrust.
Thy goodness has been with me during another year,
leading me through a twisting wilderness,
in retreat helping me to advance,
when beaten back making sure headway.
Thy goodness will be with me in the year ahead;
I hoist sail and draw up anchor,
With thee as the blessed pilot of my future as of my past.
I bless thee that thou has veiled my eyes to the waters ahead.
If thou has appointed storms of tribulation,
thou wilt be with me in them;
If I have to pass through tempests of persecution and temptation,
I shall not drown;
If I am to die,
I shall see thy face the sooner;
If a painful end is to be my lot,
grant me grace that my faith fail not;
If I am to be cast aside from the service I love,
I can make no stipulation;
Only glorify thyself in me whether in comfort or trial,
As a chosen vessel meet always for they use.

The start of 2009 is also the perfect time to decide on a new plan for spending time in God's word. Check out this impressive list of Bible reading plans. I'm still deciding what to do. I'm thinking of trying to read through the whole Bible before baby arrives, using the 90 day plan.

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Entrusting our dreams to God

We serve a God who can do the impossible. In August two years ago I wrote a long post about courtship, which I’ve summarised in some of these posts. At the end of my article I wrote: “After all this, you have to actually like the person . . . or preferably fall in love! If that all seems impossible, as it does to me often, remember that we serve a big God who loves to see his people happy and functioning effectively for his kingdom.”

I’ve been amazed at how God has answered my prayers. Marriage has been better than I ever imagined, and I still marvel at the way God brought Dave all the way across the world! I rejoice in the way we are able to support and love each other. At the same time, marriage has made me realise again the importance of trust. Singleness is a real trial to many people, especially those who struggle with sexual desires that cannot be fulfilled or with loneliness. Yet marriage can bring with it its own particular unfulfilled longings.

God chose to withhold the gift of children from Dave and I in the first year of our marriage. We always knew he might do so, and that it might even be his will that we were permanently childless. Our marriage vows contain a deliberate acknowledgement of this. We did not promise to raise “our children” to know and love Jesus, we promised this for “any children God gives us”.

Yet despite this mental acknowledgement, we experienced a lot of fear about why we weren’t getting pregnant. Many negative and even sinful emotions emerged. As the seemingly endless pregnancy announcements kept coming, we wondered if there was something wrong with us. Of course, the announcements that were attended with the label “unexpected” were the hardest.

Now that God has blessed us with an unborn child, I am still laying down dreams. The desire to adopt a child runs very deep. Yet if anything, getting pregnant has made this harder. I’ve had to repent of wanting to control situations in order to be able to adopt. Only God will enable us to adopt, just as only God could give us a biological child. It has got to be his dream, not ours.

In the face of unfulfilled dreams, we all have a choice: trust God, or be miserable and without hope. We must say with the hymn Prince of Peace, Control My Will “May thy will, not mine be done, May thy will and mine be one”. This is particularly hard when we know that what we want is in line with the general will of God. Marriage is the general will of God, as is bearing children and the placement of orphans in families. It is right to desire these things, but we must want the fulfilment of God’s specific will for our lives more – even if it means we are denied the very things we believe God’s word leads us to desire.

God does not call us to an emotionless life. Unfulfilled dreams will, at times, be a source of grief. We can entrust our broken lives, and crushed hopes, to God and know that he does not condemn our sorrow. Yet in the midst of this God is calling those who are hurting to trust Him and believe He knows best. As we seek God, He will provide ways for us to serve Him in the circumstances He has appointed. It is in God that we find our ultimate hope and inheritance, not in earthly families and relationships. He wants us to desire Him above all else.

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Don't Waste Your Life

Don’t Waste Your Life by John Piper is a heartfelt call to live out the Christian life with passion. John Piper does not advocate a “good” life, or an “ok” life, but a life devoted to enjoying God and making others happy in Him.

Don't Wate Your Life is full of the biblical themes that should define our lives: the Creation Mandate, the Great Commandment, and the Great Commission. Piper shows the way that all are essential to the furtherance of God’s Kingdom. He achieves a refreshing and essential integration of them in his call for devotion to Jesus Christ.

An entire chapter is devoted to “secular” work and its worth in the Kingdom of God. This chapter provides fresh perspective on what it means to be creative human beings who aim to exalt and enjoy God through daily work. I am going to dip back into this in order to apply it better to my approach to work at home.

John Piper draws all things into the centre of loving and enjoying God. He calls for us to love the cross, the gospel, and the beauty of God Himself. Piper shows the way love for God leads to love for others. This is expressed beautifully in part of a long prayer that makes up the final chapter:

“There is a quiet kind of joy, O Lord, that Jesus did both save us from our sin and show us how to love. His life, as you have said, was both a purchase and a path. He died for us, and now calls us to die with him. He took our poverty upon himself that we, in him, might have the riches of his heaven, and he calls us now to use our riches for the poor.”

This path of love that Jesus showed us leads us directly into the midst of the Great Commission. If we love people, we will want them and to be happy in Christ. If we love God, we will want every life and culture and nation in this world to glorify Him. Piper devotes much space to a call to take risks for the sake of the gospel, and to explaining the worth of frontier mission.

So often we can spend our lives on the “ok” things. The things we may be free to do, but which God has never said should be priorities in our lives. Piper critiques many of these things, including our culture’s entertainment obsession. In recent months, I’ve been reconsidering many of the things I do. Even “good” things can keep us from opportunities to obey Christ and show that we treasure the same things he does.

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More Love to Thee

Sharon James' biography of Elizabeth Prentiss is a worthwhile read if you would like to learn from the life of a woman who was always striving to love God more. Elizabeth Prentiss suffered many hardships, including the deaths of children. In the midst of these events, she strove to give more of herself over to God. This biography would be of particular value to women, as Elizabeth is an example of a dedicated wife, mother, homemaker, Bible study leader and hostess. However, men would also benefit from exploring with Elizabeth how to love God with increasing fervour.

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Learning to Fear God

I have recently been seeking to address my tendency toward a lack of love, and toward being excessively concerned about what others are doing. Dave and I are trying to become far more concerned about our own sins than the sins others may be commiting! I have realised that one of the roots of my lack of love is a lack of the fear of God. In John 6:44 Jesus says: "How can you believe, who receive honor from one another, and do not seek the honor that comes from the only God?". We should follow Christ, not our Christian neighbours. We seek the approval of the Almighty, not the affirmation of Christian leaders.

The actions (or lack of actions) of other Christians worry me because I depend too much upon them to affirm my own choices and beliefs. Ultimately though, what others do or think should not effect how I perceive my own Christian life. What matters is what God thinks, and what God would have us do. Even the Internet can, for me, become another way to seek to affirm myself through finding someone who agrees with me. What matters, though, is whether God agrees. If I am convinced that the fear of God requires me to heed a certain part of the Bible that others appear to disregard, that is all the motivation I should need.

It has been a real help to realise that it is the fear of God that leads me to seek to . . .

• Treasure Jesus and the gospel
• Participate in church life
  
• Pray
• Resist the temptation to speak ill of others
  
• Fill our home with good, positive, and lovely things, sounds and experiences
• Care about the poor and the persecuted church
  
• Faithfully care for our home
• Be hospitable
• Forgive
• Welcome children into our home and family
  
• Study the Bible
• Reach out to our neighbours
  
• Do what I've promised or commited to do
• Steward our money and be generous
• Use my time wisely

Focusing on fearing God, rather than on what others are doing, has already been a great help to me. For example, yesterday I got up late after being awake from 5 - 6am when Dave left to travel. I was tempted to compare myself to others, thinking about how my neighbour gets up early to go to work. Then I asked that simple question: am I fearing God. The answer was "yes", because I'd stayed in bed in an effort to have the energy to enjoy homegroup that night. This has been a real struggle for me recently! When we're fearing God, finding someone else "like us" who affirms the way we are is suddenly less important. What matters is how we believe our actions reflect (or do not reflect) obedience to God's priorities for our lives.

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Liberated to serve

Soon after coming back from South Africa (and the day before finding out I was pregnant) I wrote this in my journal:

"I felt convicted toward the end of our trip. I realised I'd been in too much of a hurry. I'd wanted everything at once. God's given me a wonderful husband and home. Yet I long for more, as though all good gifts should arrive at once. God is not in a hurry, and I think he wants me to enjoy the journey! I need to set aside some dreams, hopes, and even inner conflicts right now, heeding the voice of the only one who really makes any difference in this world, who commands me to find rest in his care. Our situation of childlessness has been teaching me that in any circumstance our hope should be to serve and glorify our creator. There are no circumstances that exclude Christians from doing those things. Christians can serve and glorify God in Afghanistan, South Africa, America, and Australia, in childlessness, small families, and large ones, large homes & tiny flats, marriage & singleness, riches & poverty, old age and childhood under godly governments and evil ones."

I am sure that God had taught me this lesson before. Yet he used particular sets of circumstances to remind me again, even more powerfully than before. This lesson has been a help to me in recent times of sickness. I should not be wishing to hurry past this season, but rather should take comfort and strength from the fact that I can serve and glorify God right now. I've felt quite liberated as I've realised that circumstances and location really don't matter. We can respond rightly to God, and serve Him, no matter what is going on in our lives.

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Praising the Lord in the Morning

Before we went to South Africa, I listened to a Nancy Campbell message about what our homes should be like. As women we have a lot of power over the atmosphere and activities of our homes! God has many purposes for our homes. One of those purposes is that our homes should be places of praise and joy.

This was a challenge to me. Joy is one area where I know my home can be lacking. I generally manage to keep it relatively clean and neat, and make it a welcoming place. I used to cook meals regularly, and I even have a garden. These were all ideas that Nancy encouraged. But I'm not sure my home is a place of joy and continual praise.

While we were in South Africa, I decided that when we arrived home I would begin each day by getting up and singing to the Lord. Whether it be with a CD or from memory or with my hymn folder, I wanted to start the day this way and set the atmosphere and the focus for it. I wanted to begin creating this atmosphere for any children God gave us, because I want them to be praising people.

On the many days when I have done this it has been a wonderful way to start the day. I am reminded of God's character, of the things He has done, and of all the blessings that we have as a result. I hope that this also helps the rest of the day to be one of focus upon Him.

Here is one of my favourite hymns, which seems to sum up the journey of my life so far and of everyday life with Jesus:

I heard the voice of Jesus say come unto me and rest
Lay down thou weary one lay down, thy head upon my breast.
I came to Jesus as I was, weary and worn and sad.
I found in Him my resting place and He has made me glad.

I heard the voice of Jesus say behold I feely give,
The living water thirsty one, toop down, and drink, and live.
I came to Jesus and I drank of that life giving stream,
My thirst was quenched, my soul revived, and now I live in Him.

I heard the voice of Jesus say, I am this dark world's light.
Look unto me, thy dawn shall rise, and all thy days be bright.
I came to Jesus and I found in Him my star, my sun.
And in that light of life I'll walk till trav'ling days are done.

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God and people

It dawned on me last week that I do have a blogging plan :). Holidays have a way of pushing these things out of my brain. So this week I'll attempt to return to the plan. It is week three of the month, so this week I'll be focusing on loving people. I've decided to split loving God and loving people into two separate categories, as the "Great Commandment" topic category is getting very fat!

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